As a San Diego sports fan, I don't particularly care for the New England Patriots or the New York Giants (to put it diplomatically). For two straight years, the Patriots have ended the Chargers' season; last year it was the most gut-wrenching loss I have ever witnessed (at least until October of this year). This year it was just a garden variety, your quarterback has no ACL, your star running back can't play, your best receiving threat can barely jog, close loss. Tom Brady is one of the most overrated players in the game today. He is not the best quarterback in the league; Peyton Manning is. When Brady puts up Manning-esque numbers for more than one year, then we can have a discussion. Brady gets a ton of credit for winning Super Bowls because he had a better defense than Manning did. Apparently a handful of good drives, leveraged in the proper place, outweigh the hundreds or thousands of drive that give a much better measure of talent. The Patriots also have an annoying habit of claiming to be the underdog and like most champions have been crowned as morally superior (you know, they're the only team to really buy into the concept of team, it's not about any one player, etc., etc.).
The Giants' starting quarterback is one Eli Manning, who refused to play for the Chargers when they drafted him first overall in 2004. Fortunately, everything worked out beautifully for the Chargers, but I will still root against the guy who was too good to come play for my favorite team. Plus, Tom Coughlin gets a few celebratory articles for being a disciplinarian, yet the Giants have perpetually been among the most penalized teams in the league. Plus, they're not very good this year. It sends a bad message when not very good teams win championships. Tangent: that's one of the good features of the BCS: the tenth best team in the game will never win the championship. Ok, well maybe it will because of the difficulty in comparing results against such disparate schedules, but the point is, if the BCS were applied to football, the fifth best team in the weaker conference would never have a shot at winning the title.
So I don't particularly care for either team. This was probably the Super Bowl matchup I would have liked the least out of all possible matchups at the start of the playoffs. Yet here are two scenarios that would make me happy, the first in a Giant victory, the second in a Patriot victory.
Pleasant Giant Victory Scenario
Eli Manning, world's greatest mouth breather, develops frostbite in his teeth while in New York because he refuses to just breath through his nose. He'll be completely fine, but he is in no condition to compete in the Super Bowl. Anthony Wright misses Plaxico Burress by 20 yards to the left in warmups, hitting Vince Wilfork who's warming up on the Patriot sideline. Wilfork comes over and pokes Wright in the eye through his facemask. Tom Coughlin is worried that Wright will be intimidated, and also realizes that Wright sucks, so he puts in 6'4'', 285 lb. Jared Lorenzen to start the game. The Pillsbury Throwboy compiles 300 yards passing in a high scoring shootout. Tom Brady is terrible, but Brandon Jacobs keeps fumbling the ball and Junior Seau keeps returning the fumbles for touchdowns. With 4 seconds left and down by 4, the Giants have the ball on the Patriots 40 yard line. Lorenzen drops back for the Hail Mary pass, but the pocket collapses immediately, and he's forced to run for his life. He gets 10 yards before bulldozing Rodney Harrison. Wilfork and Seymour converge on him, but he pinballs off both of them, and they collide with each other. Lorenzen stumbles on. He reaches the 5, where Vrabel and Bruschi both dive at him. Lorenzen takes an epic leap, diving for the end zone. He lands at the 4. But then he starts rolling and doesn't stop until the ball has crossed the plane of the end zone, right before he's touched down by Vrabel. Touchdown, Giants! Giants win! Jared Lorenzen is the hero.
Pleasant Patriot Victory Scenario
As Tom Brady warms up for the Super Bowl, he gets a desperate call from Gisele saying that she is breaking up with him to be with Peyton Manning. Brady immediately sprints out of the stadium, chartering a private jet to fly him to Gisele to see if he can persuade her to change her mind. He gets to her, but discovers it was all just a plot by Peyton to help his brother win the Super Bowl. While Brady is gone, Matt Cassel admirably steps in and leads the Patriots to a 55-0 victory. Cassel is named Super Bowl MVP and is lauded across the land for his cool, clutch play. He is named People's Sexiest Man Alive and does photo shoots with a goat. Girls everywhere swoon over him. When Brady is relegated to second string, Gisele dumps him and goes after Peyton Manning.
And in either scenario, everyone lives happily ever after.
Showing posts with label the glorious scratch that heartbreaking San Diego sports tradition. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the glorious scratch that heartbreaking San Diego sports tradition. Show all posts
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Monday, January 14, 2008
Still basking in the glow - and basking in the glow of all the previous failures
It's far too early to look ahead to the upcoming steamrolling the Chargers are going to receive from the Patriots. Wednesday through Saturday will bring plenty of time for that. For now, I'd like to continue to bask in the glow of the Chargers victory over the Colts yesterday. I still cannot believe they pulled it out. San Diego sports teams have a glorious history of choking in the clutch, of getting screwed by the officials and lady luck but failing to rise above those challenges and persevere to victory. Ok, maybe they don't have a particularly glorious history of that, but the last few years have been pretty brutal in those regards. To recap:
A (recent) history of violent failure
In 1998, the Padres reached the World Series. In Game 1, they reached the bottom of the seventh in Yankee Stadium with a 5-2 lead. A Knoblauch homer tied the game, and with two outs and the bases loaded in the 5-5 game, Tino Martinez stepped to the plate against Mark Langston. They reached a 2-2 count, and Langston threw a fastball over the outside corner. It was clearly a strike. Langston knew it was a strike. The NY Times describes the Yankees bench as having gone quiet because they knew it was a strike. And yet somehow, it was a ball to Rich Garcia. Martinez homered on the next pitch, and the World Series was over for the Padres.
Time elapsed, and the Padres and Chargers mainly sucked too much to choke in key situations. Finally, in 2004 the Chargers returned to the playoffs. Drew Brees led a great fourth quarter comeback that ended in a touchdown to tie the game. It was aided by a roughing the quarterback call on the Jets on a fourth down failure that would have ended the game, but that was pretty clearly the correct call. The defender had driven his arm into Brees' helmet; you're not allowed to do that. In overtime, the Chargers got the ball and drove down the field for what should have been a routine field goal. Nate Kaeding pushed his 40 yard attempt wide right, and the Jets responded to their second chance by driving down the field to make their own game winning field goal.
The Padres made the playoffs in 2005 and 2006, yet did nothing either time. At least they finally managed to win a game in 2006 against a bad Cardinals team that they should have easily taken the series against. Instead, they lost in four games. The Chargers also made the playoffs in 2006 after a dominating season in which they finished 14-2. In one of history's all time epic choke jobs, they lost to a clearly inferior Patriots team 24-21 after: five fumbles in the game, all recovered by the Patriots; one solid drive by the Patriots all game, occurring right before half time when Wade Phillips made the incredible decision to play a prevent defense with plenty of time left on the clock; an interception of Brady late in the fourth quarter with an 8 point lead; a subsequent fumble back to the Patriots on the return of that interception; numerous dropped passes throughout; going for it on fourth and 11 instead of kicking a long but very makeable field goal; a stupid personal foul penalty committed by Drayton Florence, giving the Patriots an easy field goal when a sack had pushed them back out of range; a 54 yard field goal attempted with 8 seconds left (plenty of time left to run a play to gain 5 more yards to make the field goal much easier). Yes, that was a bad game.
In 2007, the Padres put together a good season and were a win or a Rockies loss away from clinching a playoff spot with two games to go. They were one strike away from beating the Brewers, but Tony Gwynn, Jr. tripled off of a Trevor Hoffman changeup and the Brewers ultimately won the game. They defeated the Padres the next day, and the D-Backs rolled over and gave their final two games to the Rockies, leading to a one game playoff in Colorado for the wild card. The Padres and Rockies played the best baseball game I've seen, a back and forth battle that lasted 13 innings. Special commendation should be given to Heath Bell, who pitched a season high 2 2/3 innings with 5 k's and no hits allowed. He entered with runners on first and second and one out in the seventh innning and struck out Ryan Spilborghs and Yorvit Torrealba to end the threat. In the 13th, Scott Hairston struck a two run homer, scoring Brian Giles (who had worked a walk), and the Padres looked headed to the playoffs yet again. They just needed three outs from the second greatest closer of all time. Yeah, those outs never came, though. Well, one of them did. A second one should have. But instead, the umpire ruled Holliday safe, despite him never touching home plate, and instead of a tie game with two outs and a runner of first, the game was over and the Rockies had won. So yeah, that was kind of a tough loss to take.
The Chargers game Sunday seemed to be imitating the Padres game against the Rockies. San Diego's best player (Peavy, Tomlinson) had a so-so game and was out of it at about the halfway mark. Their most important player down the stretch (Bradley, Rivers) was hurt for the most important part of the season (the last week of it for Bradley, the fourth quarter for Rivers). A huge call went against them (the play at the plate for the Padres, the interception return for a touchdown called back on a phantom hold for the Chargers). The backup to the most important player (Hairston, Rivers) accounted for the go-ahead scores (Hairston's homer, Volek's qb sneak). I was fully expecting David Binn (the longest tenured Charger) to snap the ball over Mike Scifres' head on the Chargers' last punt of the game, mirroring how Hoffman (the longest tenured Padre) had blown the Rockies game. Instead, Binn was clutch, delivering a beautiful snap, allowing Scifres to get off a booming kick, and sprinting down the field to make the tackle on the returner.
So somehow the Chargers held on and won, defying 10 years of San Diego postseason tradition. And it was glorious. If only previous San Diego athletes had been more like David Binn.
Disclaimer: I'm not really as bitter about these moments as I appear, except perhaps at Rich Garcia. I also don't believe in clutch as an ability - studies have shown that in baseball performing better in the clutch is a very small and unimportant skill. The best clutch players are the best players in every other situation.
A (recent) history of violent failure
In 1998, the Padres reached the World Series. In Game 1, they reached the bottom of the seventh in Yankee Stadium with a 5-2 lead. A Knoblauch homer tied the game, and with two outs and the bases loaded in the 5-5 game, Tino Martinez stepped to the plate against Mark Langston. They reached a 2-2 count, and Langston threw a fastball over the outside corner. It was clearly a strike. Langston knew it was a strike. The NY Times describes the Yankees bench as having gone quiet because they knew it was a strike. And yet somehow, it was a ball to Rich Garcia. Martinez homered on the next pitch, and the World Series was over for the Padres.
Time elapsed, and the Padres and Chargers mainly sucked too much to choke in key situations. Finally, in 2004 the Chargers returned to the playoffs. Drew Brees led a great fourth quarter comeback that ended in a touchdown to tie the game. It was aided by a roughing the quarterback call on the Jets on a fourth down failure that would have ended the game, but that was pretty clearly the correct call. The defender had driven his arm into Brees' helmet; you're not allowed to do that. In overtime, the Chargers got the ball and drove down the field for what should have been a routine field goal. Nate Kaeding pushed his 40 yard attempt wide right, and the Jets responded to their second chance by driving down the field to make their own game winning field goal.
The Padres made the playoffs in 2005 and 2006, yet did nothing either time. At least they finally managed to win a game in 2006 against a bad Cardinals team that they should have easily taken the series against. Instead, they lost in four games. The Chargers also made the playoffs in 2006 after a dominating season in which they finished 14-2. In one of history's all time epic choke jobs, they lost to a clearly inferior Patriots team 24-21 after: five fumbles in the game, all recovered by the Patriots; one solid drive by the Patriots all game, occurring right before half time when Wade Phillips made the incredible decision to play a prevent defense with plenty of time left on the clock; an interception of Brady late in the fourth quarter with an 8 point lead; a subsequent fumble back to the Patriots on the return of that interception; numerous dropped passes throughout; going for it on fourth and 11 instead of kicking a long but very makeable field goal; a stupid personal foul penalty committed by Drayton Florence, giving the Patriots an easy field goal when a sack had pushed them back out of range; a 54 yard field goal attempted with 8 seconds left (plenty of time left to run a play to gain 5 more yards to make the field goal much easier). Yes, that was a bad game.
In 2007, the Padres put together a good season and were a win or a Rockies loss away from clinching a playoff spot with two games to go. They were one strike away from beating the Brewers, but Tony Gwynn, Jr. tripled off of a Trevor Hoffman changeup and the Brewers ultimately won the game. They defeated the Padres the next day, and the D-Backs rolled over and gave their final two games to the Rockies, leading to a one game playoff in Colorado for the wild card. The Padres and Rockies played the best baseball game I've seen, a back and forth battle that lasted 13 innings. Special commendation should be given to Heath Bell, who pitched a season high 2 2/3 innings with 5 k's and no hits allowed. He entered with runners on first and second and one out in the seventh innning and struck out Ryan Spilborghs and Yorvit Torrealba to end the threat. In the 13th, Scott Hairston struck a two run homer, scoring Brian Giles (who had worked a walk), and the Padres looked headed to the playoffs yet again. They just needed three outs from the second greatest closer of all time. Yeah, those outs never came, though. Well, one of them did. A second one should have. But instead, the umpire ruled Holliday safe, despite him never touching home plate, and instead of a tie game with two outs and a runner of first, the game was over and the Rockies had won. So yeah, that was kind of a tough loss to take.
The Chargers game Sunday seemed to be imitating the Padres game against the Rockies. San Diego's best player (Peavy, Tomlinson) had a so-so game and was out of it at about the halfway mark. Their most important player down the stretch (Bradley, Rivers) was hurt for the most important part of the season (the last week of it for Bradley, the fourth quarter for Rivers). A huge call went against them (the play at the plate for the Padres, the interception return for a touchdown called back on a phantom hold for the Chargers). The backup to the most important player (Hairston, Rivers) accounted for the go-ahead scores (Hairston's homer, Volek's qb sneak). I was fully expecting David Binn (the longest tenured Charger) to snap the ball over Mike Scifres' head on the Chargers' last punt of the game, mirroring how Hoffman (the longest tenured Padre) had blown the Rockies game. Instead, Binn was clutch, delivering a beautiful snap, allowing Scifres to get off a booming kick, and sprinting down the field to make the tackle on the returner.
So somehow the Chargers held on and won, defying 10 years of San Diego postseason tradition. And it was glorious. If only previous San Diego athletes had been more like David Binn.
Disclaimer: I'm not really as bitter about these moments as I appear, except perhaps at Rich Garcia. I also don't believe in clutch as an ability - studies have shown that in baseball performing better in the clutch is a very small and unimportant skill. The best clutch players are the best players in every other situation.
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